"The Death card, in tarot, marks ends and beginnings. Although most illustrations
of the Death card tend to be morbid, the forces behind the Death card
are actually quite exciting. Yes Death does mark the end of something.
But ends are often brought about by completion and not loss. Most
endings are actually good, and make room for us to begin new adventures."
This card seems apt for this entry as it sums up many of my feelings on issues.
For one, I'm using it as a conclusion for my feelings towards my ex. The behavior displayed this last week has been that of someone who really doesn't care about me or my feelings. It is instead, the behavior of a rabid hedonists, and I am not going to let the misguided pursuits of someone else bother me any longer. Despite my feelings, as a cancer, I am not one to give myself over to those who harbor ill will towards me, intentional or not. I would like to proclaim a friendship here, but I'm not even sure what would be the point of it. I don't have any ill intention, it is just, I do not care, anymore.
I've been struggling with anger towards my past recently. The animosity towards my parents is still very much alive, but I find no resolution or fulfillment in dwelling on past circumstances. While I would love to lecture on about how much pain they have caused me, I don't know what purpose or good would come from it, other than making them feel horrible, and I do not wish that.
This is also the start of the end of this chapter in my life. So much lies ahead for me come 2011. I will have finished my education, and aside from a little debt, have no financial obligations or ties to where I am. I can move anywhere in the country (or out of it) and start a new existence. This is really the beginning of my adult life, and I am quite anxious to see where it goes. So the death card is quite appropriate, I'm ending an interest, and coming to the end of a huge chapter in my life. I'm not sure where I will end up, but, while there is some anxiety, It doesn't seem insurmountable
of the Death card tend to be morbid, the forces behind the Death card
are actually quite exciting. Yes Death does mark the end of something.
But ends are often brought about by completion and not loss. Most
endings are actually good, and make room for us to begin new adventures."
This card seems apt for this entry as it sums up many of my feelings on issues.
For one, I'm using it as a conclusion for my feelings towards my ex. The behavior displayed this last week has been that of someone who really doesn't care about me or my feelings. It is instead, the behavior of a rabid hedonists, and I am not going to let the misguided pursuits of someone else bother me any longer. Despite my feelings, as a cancer, I am not one to give myself over to those who harbor ill will towards me, intentional or not. I would like to proclaim a friendship here, but I'm not even sure what would be the point of it. I don't have any ill intention, it is just, I do not care, anymore.
I've been struggling with anger towards my past recently. The animosity towards my parents is still very much alive, but I find no resolution or fulfillment in dwelling on past circumstances. While I would love to lecture on about how much pain they have caused me, I don't know what purpose or good would come from it, other than making them feel horrible, and I do not wish that.
This is also the start of the end of this chapter in my life. So much lies ahead for me come 2011. I will have finished my education, and aside from a little debt, have no financial obligations or ties to where I am. I can move anywhere in the country (or out of it) and start a new existence. This is really the beginning of my adult life, and I am quite anxious to see where it goes. So the death card is quite appropriate, I'm ending an interest, and coming to the end of a huge chapter in my life. I'm not sure where I will end up, but, while there is some anxiety, It doesn't seem insurmountable
No comments:
Post a Comment